Safe Space Alchemy
Merge and transform...
Photo by Rebecca Peterson Hall on Unsplash
I’ve been thinking a lot about the being, rather than doing, of coaching. Noticing myself with an itchiness to step even more into being. Which got me thinking about being in flow when I feel, somehow, my clients and I do deep, meaningful, valuable work.
So I peered a little closer and noticed the space in between and all around us. As coaches we talk about ‘safe space’ - creating it, holding it, feeling it - all the time. So what is this ‘safe space’ we hold so dear? And what does it enable for our clients?
As coaches who are Highly Sensitive People (HSPs), we know how important our environment is for us too. With our senses taking in every detail and subtlety. Every sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch. Processing them deeply. The space we find ourselves in can make the difference between overstimulation and exhaustion; or feeling re-energised and nourished.
I was curious about this magical, mysterious ‘safe space’, and a meandering led to this piece. A poem with three parts, spread across a day.
Part 1 - Candlelight A sanctuary, a cave, calm and cosy Gentle music soothes, the writing corner calls I go inwards noticing the presence of my breath Weft and weave of the blanket tickles my legs My feelings and thoughts spill out in morning pages Purging my stuff to clear the way for the day I’m held by this space taking me down a few levels Keeping the anxiety of the future at bay Surrounded by things that have meaning for me I inhale oxygen from plants, nodding “good morning” A candle for company, comfort and connection Flickering, reaching up, peeking, gently waving A ritual, a pause, a moment to tune in to mySelf This space lets me show up, be present for Thinkers Our souls meet, I see me in them, them in me Let the learning with, from, and alongside others begin
Part 2 - Sunlight The small marble statue in prayer draped in beads A pretty plate of crystals, rose quartz, catch my eye Thinker One arrives, cheeks flushed raspberry red Hair gathered up, rebel wisps escape Carrying a heavy burden in her splintered heart “What’s in your tears?” a gentle inquiry Salty rivers express, release, bring relief We visit a mountain, see islands of possibilities The hourglass sand sparkles in the sunlight An acorn winks, I’ll be an oak tree, like Thinker Two He arrives distracted, skirting, afraid to look in the eye “What will I do when the roundabout stops spinning?” The fear of rejection, judgement, his shy quiet side “What if they don’t come out to play?” he sighs The space lets the boy from fifty years ago speak up Shrinking his fears small enough to 'eat the green frog!' A postcard predicts “you are not your worst thoughts” Thinker Three appears with their moat, drawbridge up Lack of self-confidence, esteem and belief spill They self-critique, misguided protection holds them back “It doesn’t have to be this way, I get to choose?” Fizzy cherry cola bubbles rise, recede with relief The space gives them options, new thinking, encouragement Permission to let go and take back their power
Part 3 - Moonlight Many books a symbol of the wisdom held here I flick on the switch of my little Moon lamp This space is like Harry Potter’s Room of Requirement Always giving and providing in times of need Where we come back to ourSelves We don't have to pretend or try to fit in Gifting the time to confess, wonder and explore Knowing we’re safe, work out a way forward The day tiptoes by in shadows across shutters A gentle caressing light filling the room Although there is stillness, things are ebbing and flowing Coming and going, always in motion The Moon illuminates what’s felt in the ether A deep satisfaction, connected and earthed A slowing down, tucking and tidying away A fusion of the Thinkers, the space, and I, alchemy
The meandering which led to this piece revealed several gems. The space is as much inside us, part of us, as well as the air where we are taking up space. There are clues to the secret ingredients from the energy and invitations all around. I can see now that what happens in the space, and how safe it feels, is created by the alchemy of all of that coming together.
Always be vulnerable, brave and daring!
Sensitively,
Gentle Gillian x
#GentleGillian
Reflective Questions for You:
Gather up your favourite journal, a cup of something good. Perhaps light a candle, spend some time in your space, and ponder these questions, getting curious:
What do you notice about the inside and outside space you work in?
How is your space working with or against your sensitivity trait as an HSP Coach?
What’s clearer now about the essence of ‘safe space’ for you and your clients?
This speaks volumes about the care you put into your work.
Thank you Gillian. Reading your words is like a meditation - so much wisdom and beauty. Sensitivity is a wonderful gift (though not always easy). I love your reference to the Room of Requirement.